Not Enough Buttons: Fixing Facebook Edition


When someone sends me a Facebook friend request, why are my only choices "confirm" or "ignore"? These are useful if you like, or don't know the person, but what about the folks on the other side of a burnt bridge? What about the person who screwed you when they were in the position of power and is now very nice because you are in the power seat? What about people you just don't like? There is no satisfaction in an ignore.

Where is the app that sends messages like these to the person making the request:
"No thank you."
"Are you out of your ever loving mind?"
"You must be kidding me."
"But I never liked you."
"What makes you think I want to be your friend?"
"I am so sorry you were under the impression I am your friend."
Conversely, what about when you get the request, or acceptance, from someone you never thought would talk to you. Someone you admire personally or in business? Someone who you didn't think knew you, but can advance your career? Someone you only read about until the request. Is confirm really enough? I know you can write a reply, but you don't want to say something stupid.

Where are:
"Are you sure you have the right person?"
"Wow, of course I'll be your friend."
"Sounds great, I'll be right over."
"You mean "friend" friend of Facebook friend? I'm ok with either."
"Are you out of your ever loving mind?"
"You must be kidding me."
As you can see, some of the buttons would be very robust and work in both situations. It would be so much more interesting. Befriending would become a sport.  Requests would require people to put skin in the game.

I am sure you folks can think of more.

Comments

Unknown said…
A woman did, in fact, try to friend me yesterday. I didn't know her -- she said she wanted to follow my feeds, so I gave her a URL that tracks all of my various posts across various blogs.

Then she said, "You're a social media expert, and you don't want to friend me?"

I reckon she missed the larger point that social networks are forged bonds of trust. And unless you observe that bond across the entire network, your network is more-or-less useless. I wrote her back, asking her not to contact me again. Such a fundamental miss (and pushy attitude) isn't worth the effort.

I've actually started weeding my networks lately. If you're boring, or pointless, or too woo-woo-new-agey, and I really don't know you well, you get cut off.

And that actually feels good. Like a long-overdue haircut.
August 22, 2008 at 1:33 AM
Unknown said…
Mark,

You remain, the smartest guy I know.
August 22, 2008 at 5:27 AM
Anonymous said…
As I'm new to Facebook, and of late getting way too many Facebook "friend" requests, I second.
March 2, 2009 at 12:32 PM
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